Mom of the Year - post 1 of 9 million.
Ugh. You know how we all sarcastically post that we're "mom of the year" often? I really took the cake today. Snip had "Bike Day" at preschool today. This involves days and days of learning bike safety beforehand as well as lots of other safety things for summer. Then, the kids all get to bring their bikes, helmets, and have a trike-a-thon where parents can come and sit and watch the kids on their bikes, showing their new safety skills, etc. So, while it's super fun, a kind of ending to their safety week, really the point is for the kids to learn how to be safe. Snip was SOOOO excited and we prayed the rain would hold off. It did.
At about 5 to 11, Snail and Puppy finished up a snack, I wiped down messy hands and faces, and I packed up the diaper bag and we headed over (literally down our street and across the highway) to the school. It had been cloudy most of the morning. The sun was now blazing. Snail jumped out of the van and went to stand in the grass, just like any other time we get out at the school, and I went to grab the Puppy. That was when it hit me. You know, the smell of a disastrous, up the back, out the sides, nasty, steamy poo. Poor Puppy. I had checked him before we left. Nuthin. So between my house and the literally 1 minute drive, the kid had shat. Ok, no biggy. But that sun (that was non-existent before) was now baking my back as I yanked him out of his seat. No problem, just change him in the van, and head over. I lay him on the floor and reach for the diaper bag. Open it up, 3 diapers. No wipes. No wipes. Oh for the love of God and all things holy, no wipes. Yep, cause I had grabbed them to wipe of snotty, snack caked faces before we left. And never put them back in. Well, being a mom of 3, I always have a huge tub of wipes in the console. I reach for them. They aren't there. Who removed them and where they are, I'll probably never know. So, what do you do? Of course, I had to resort to the ...NAPKINS in the glove box. Um, have you ever wiped up a nasty ass-plosion from a baby's butt with NAPKINS? I mean I might as well have ripped pages out of the Avengers book in the back of the seat and wiped his butt with that. I did the best I could...and it was ok. Hopefully any remnants of poo wouldn't be smelled since we'd be outside! Mom of the Year.
One crisis semi-averted. We headed over and the kids were streaming out of the school, ready to go, so excited!! I spotted Snip, so happy, smiling, so excited, in his sweet dinosaur shirt, and waved to him. He waved back. It was one of those proud moments where, you know, you feel your eyes start to swell and get soggy just thinking of it all....the first time he road a bike, how excited he was to ride with his friends, all the friends he has, that preschool is over next week, etc. The tears welled up and I quickly pushed them and those weepy thoughts out of my head. It was turning out to be a beautiful day...quite warm, actually, and the sun was BLAZING. Of course, I didn't bring sunscreen OR a hat for Snail OR Puppy, so what did we do? Sit in the direct sun. It was really our only choice as there is pretty much no shade in the parking lot. So, they both definitely got their first big sun of the season. Mom of the Year.
Snip begins riding around with all of his friends, he's peddling so hard, flying around, doing so well. There are 20-some kids in his class. I want to say there are 18 boys and maybe 3 girls. There were bikes of all kinds. There were tricycles, bicycles, training wheels, no training wheels, etc. Snip's bike is a plain old bike with training wheels. He is not to the point of no training wheels yet. He was peddling so hard, going pretty good. He peddled over to me, an angry look on his face "____________ is faster than me." Well, I knew this was coming...because that's just Snip. "OK", I said, "well, you're doing really good! Go have fun!" and off he goes. Next time around "________________ isn't using training wheels." "I know." "I'd be faster if I didn't have training wheels." "Well, I think you're doing great. You just have something to work toward this summer! You can make it a goal to be done with your training wheels. Now go back with your friends." Glares. Mean looks. But off he went. "Ugh, his attitude stinks," I said to no one in particular. The mom to my left says "Maybe it's just a phase." "Must be a 3-year phase," I said.
*****Here's where I need help.....was I too harsh? Did I handle that ok?*****
He's flying around in circles, he's doing great, Snail and Puppy's heads and faces are burning, but you know. They bikers do some things, it's hard for me to watch the whole time, trying to watch Puppy and poor Snail, I see how the middle kid kinda sometimes gets forgotten, he was off pretending to be a ninja in the field. I totally missed Snip weaving in and out of the cones. But I have to tell myself, at least I was there, right? Stop feeling guilty. Stop expecting perfection. Next thing I know, I hear Snip's teacher yelling...."Keep your hands on the handle bars!!!!" Yep, she was talking to my kid. I see him peddling away, no hands. Of course that famous phrase "LOOK MOM! NO HANDS!!!" goes buzzing through my head. Really??? I guess since he couldn't show off by speeding around with no training wheels, he figured he show off with NO HANDS!!! Ugh. He didn't listen to his teacher. He looked at her and put his hands higher. Really? Oh no you didn't. Oh no, you did NOT. I yelled from the side, where Puppy is squirming and has been, probably from feeling bits of poo on his butt and flames coming off of his face, for him to "LISTEN TO MISS AUBREY!! PUT YOUR HANDS ON YOUR HANDLEBARS!!!!" Does he listen. No. He continues to ride around, no hands. I think I shouted something like "You can spend the day in your room if you can't listen!" Again, not the best way to handle it, I am sure, but he put his hands on his handlebars. Puppy is still wiggling, not happy, and I'm hearing "HI-YAAA!" behind me coming from Snail. Now, Snip is off to riding in a tiny circle, right beside the parents while all of the other kids are smiling and riding in the big huge circle that their teacher told them to ride in. Every single other kid is listening. I say to him "Go with your class, listen to your teacher." He just looks at me and continues to ride in this tiny circle. "Snip, GO!" I yell. Still riding in little circles. I had had it. The sun was blazing, the sweat was pouring, the stinky Puppy was burning and squirming, "HI-YA! HI-YA! HI-YA!!!" I had had it. I got up and asked his teacher if the kids could just leave when they were ready (it was about 2 minutes until the "end of their day" anyway), and she said yes, they were already packed up, they could go. So, Puppy attached to my hip, I went and told Snip to get off his bike, it was time to go. Of course, here comes the full-blown break down. "I don't want to go, it's not over, my friends aren't leaving, etc." and the tears are streaming. Great. Miss Aubrey, using both first and middle name (which happens quite often because she's been his teacher for 2 years now and she knows how he operates) telling him he's five years old, and he's crying? Other parents are looking, I'm trying to haul Puppy and the bike to the van, mumbling something like "learning a lesson the hard way", while yelling at the ninja to get in, explaining as calmly as I can to Snip that if he doesn't want to listen, we're going home. ROYAL FIT. Takes off his helmet and WHIPS it across the field. At this point, I'm really hoping that the look will work. It doesn't. That little SHIT Snip takes off across the field TOWARDS THE HIGHWAY. Oh GOD!! I didn't mean for it to get to this...I was trying to make a point that he has to listen, I'm the worst mother ever, my kid is running towards the highway. Now, I know that he'd never run into the road, as this is the road we cross sometimes twice a day to go to and come from school, and he KNOWS where to stop, but still. Panic. I'm YELLING at this point. Using first, middle, AND last name. To STOP. RIGHT. NOW. and GET. OVER. HERE. in my low, grumbling, I'm-serious-this-is-no-joke voice. He stops and glares and glares and glares. Our looks were probably mirror images....and in my mind, images of my mom's glares at me at that age seem to look about the same. He stomps over and gets in the car. In the car, I say to him...."Do you know why I made you leave?" "Cause you're mean." "Well, maybe. But mostly because you weren't listening to me OR Miss Aubrey. You were doing something today that if you don't listen, you could get hurt, or your friends could get hurt.........." aaaaannd I'm sure he wasn't hearing a word of what I said. He was looking out the window wanting to be with his friends. Tears streaming. And I am the WORST MOTHER EVER. How could I do this to him? I just totally ruined his bike day. No, HE ruined his bike day.....and I'm seeing myself when I was his age ruining something because of my little attitude. I want to shake my 5-year-old self and tell her to "loose the tude." And now, 2.5 hours later, we've talked, hugged lots, and talked some more. Did I do the right thing? I don't know. Any other time, I'd have stuck to my guns just like this time, but this time, the Mumma who loves that kid more than anything keeps saying "You ruined his bike day. His last one of preschool." but then, I just can't see myself sitting by as he doesn't listen to me OR his teachers, and just smile, say that's normal 5-year-old behavior. Cause this kid's going to Kindergarden next year. He'll be riding a bus. He'll be out in the world. Dude's got to learn how to listen. Here's the happy Snip, before he decided to stop listening.
Bye for now...
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